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Whose blog is it anyway?

Disclaimer: This entry is going to be done all �Whose line is it anyway� improve style, so deal with it.

Announcer

Welcome to Whose Blog is it Anyway, the blog where we take comments from the audience and act them out for you on paper. We award points based on performance and the winner gets to do a special something with me at the end. Let�s get started. Our first game is called Expert. We�ve previously asked the audience to write down a bunch of random subjects. We�ve taken the good ones and put them in this hat. Points to big top hat. I�ll randomly select one and Hotcarl will have to act out a scene where he is an expert on the subject. Sticks hand in hat, swirls it around a bit and pulls out a folded green piece of paper and unfolds it. Ok Hotcarl, you are an expert in the meaning of life.

Hotcarl

Thank you, thank you. I am very pleased to be speaking here today about the meaning of life. Life it�s a mighty long time and I�m here to tell you, there�s something else, the afterworld. A world of never ending happiness, where you can always see the sun, day or night. So when you call up that shrink in Beverly hills, you know the one, tells you everything�ll be alright, ask him how much of your time is left, not how much of your mind. Cause in this life, your on your own. And if the elevator tries to bring you down, go crazy� punch the highest floor.

Announcer

Excellent job. 10 points. Let�s move on, shall we. Our next game is entitled Film and Theatre styles. This is a game where Hotcarl and James will act out a scene from a film. As they do it, I will throw out random styles that they will have to act the scene in. Let�s get started, the first style is reaches in hat and pulls out another slip of paper and reads it old west.

Hotcarl

Howdy Pilgrim. I recon you�ve seen the memo on the TPS reports? Because we sort of have a problem here, pardner. No cover sheet.

James

Sheriff Lumbergh, I do declare, I must of plum forgotten.

Announcer

Musical

Hotcarl

You should be putting cover sheets

On those TPS reports, please

I�ll make sure you see the memo this date

Cover sheets for your reports would be great

James

I�ve got the memo right here

I�ve been filling reports for over a year

Not until tomorrow does it ship

No problem, we�re not in any sh-

Announcer

OK, great job. Announcer interrupts Umm 1000 points for Hotcarl for being able to work TPS reports into a show tune. No points for James. Crowd chuckles. Our next game is called News Flash. Hotcarl and James will be our anchors and they will attempt to describe a scene to Joe, our reporter. At the end of the skit Joe will have to guess where he is.

James

Thank you Bonnie for that excellent report on nose hair trimmers. I am sure we could all use some grooming up there. We�re now going to Joe who is on the scene of some late breaking news.

Hotcarl

Joe, can you tell us what you�re seeing.

Joe

Well Hotcarl, its kinda of hard to describe. I can just say it�s something we never expected to happen.

James

Joe, do you think it�s safe for that woman to be doing that?

Joe

It�s hard to say, James. I am sure she is a trained professional.

Hotcarl

Oh my! I don�t think they�ve been making �em like the used to. Any proof of that, Joe?

Joe

I spoke earlier with the man in charge and he confirmed, �no, we aren�t making them like we used too.�

Hotcarl

Joe, it seems it�s going to collapse under that weight. Do you think someone should help?

Joe

Perhaps they should Hotcarl. But it�s not going to be me. I just report the news, I don�t make it.

James

Perhaps next time she should just order in.

Joe

Yes, James. The manager assured me he would ask her to stay at home next time.

Announcer

Ok, Joe. What were you seeing?

Joe

I was reporting on a fat woman eating at a restaurant and breaking the stool?

Announcer

Close, it was a groupie trying to seduce Ruben Studdard.

Joe

Ah� Oh!

Announcer

No points for anyone. That brings us to the end and our winner is Hotcarl, but since Hotcarl seems bored we�re all going to play a game we call Hoedown. Each of us will have to sing a verse about transvestites. The music starts as the announcers and players stand in line on the stage

Announcer

Oh, some boys will be boys

They like all their toys

One boy gave it a whirl

That boy was a girl

Joe

Still some girls will be girls

Long pony tails and curls

One girl had a plan

That girl was a man

Joe

See there are some people

Who try and hide their steeple

They travel all over the land

Covering up their gland

Hotcarl

By now you should know

We�re talking about Joe

I bet you could guess

He looks good in a dress.

Hotcarl, James, Announcer, Joe

He looks good, in a dress-

Have fun,

j

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